Transformational Coaching
In wellness,
Susan
Susan is a Life Coach based in Seattle, WA. Her main focus is to coach people build a strong emotional container so that we can experience the fullness of life coming from a place of deep confidence. Susan also coaches clients looking to heal adrenal fatigue by using a mental meta-model aimed at breaking down old mental patterns and behaviors so that we can finally tap into our own personal power.
This week’s theme is trust.
So often I’ve heard over and over again how being confused about what next step to take can be one of the most frustrating experiences a human can go through. To feel lost, without purpose, and trying to get back up, but no North Star pointing the way. What’s a person to do?
At times like this I tell others, and myself, to trust the path you’re on.
Just trust it. Every discomfort, from the uncomfortable emotions to all the triggers, is for a bigger perspective we just can’t see yet.
Sometimes we need to shed a few unnecessary and un-serving layers within our psyche to finally see the path, and unfortunately this is going to take as long as it needs.
But what we have always is trust. When we trust we become open, and when we are open we become lighter, and with this lightness of our minds we open our awareness enough to have true sight about the situation.
And with this we can begin to lessen our grip on control and breathe in a sigh of relief that things are unfolding for our betterment, and our focus can be to see things with curiosity instead of fear.
Afterall, through this curiosity we just may see the ah-ha…
In wellness,
Susan
With adrenal fatigue I mentioned that true, rapid healing came with letting go; with accepting the situation and beginning to notice all the joy that was present in my life. Another way to put it, to surrender to life and say aloud, “You know what? I don’t even care anymore. I’m going to live life with this and make the most of it anyway.”
Ironically, the moment I did that I started to heal. Or maybe… I began to see my life the way it already was – full of magic.
Recently I became reacquainted of this very principle and realized, whether it’s adrenal fatigue or any other situation that is causing immense discomfort in your life, this very act of surrendering is the very key to introducing rapid healing into your life.
No matter what you are going through, for one second, one breath, remember there are other things happening aside from whatever it is you spend 90% of your day thinking about and wishing could be different.
In that one breath you begin to notice the stillness. The joy. The little moments. The birds. The trees swaying with the rhythm of the wind. You begin to notice life is much MORE than that one thing we so wish to change. And that life was always filled with this magic – we were just too busy with our discomfort to notice.
When we take that moment and begin to notice life outside of the discomfort, we begin to allow for space. This space will prove to be your best friend because you realize the more you give into this space, the more freedom you have from the stickiness of just how real that discomfort it.
Now what I just implied can be interpreted as, “the discomfort isn’t real”, but what I’m trying to say is oftentimes, it is our thought or relationship to the discomfort that is causing the MOST pain.
Funny how our brains operate isn’t it? This is why I believe mindfulness and coaching is so important. Sanity is everything!
So, what does that one breath represent to you? What do you notice when you step back and notice the little things?
Here’s to more space and a better relationship with our discomfort.
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Sarah Dorweiler on Unsplash
Oftentimes our immediate reaction to something uncomfortable is to get as far as away as we can. However, what we don’t realize is what we avoid doesn’t dissolve, it stays exactly where it is until we come across it again or rather, it appears in a different shape or form so that we may learn the lesson.
What if instead we approached the discomfort with a knowing instead? Perhaps we may not know the answer or the why in the beginning, but what if we approached our deeper self with a wink and an, “ah- this is supposed to happen isn’t it?“.
What if there was an reason for what is happening? Whether it’s the current astrological conditions or physiological patterns of your body (i.e., hormones anyone?) there could be a billion reasons as to why you are feeling the way you’re feeling! And the conclusion shouldn’t be, “what’s wrong with me?!”.
Hindsight is everything and if you’re anything like me, you’ll quickly realize there was a reason for every little thing you may have questioned.
So why not greet the discomfort with a thank you from your future self?
Here’s to trusting the flow and giving our best to each and every moment.
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Lisa Verena Pape on Unsplash
Ah, if there are two words that have become the ultimate power play for 2018 it’s this: Personal Responsibility.
When I think of personal responsibility it automatically presumes the power is in my hands, not anyone else’s.
Think about it, how many times these past few days have you allowed others or some thing to put you into a mood? Whether we like it or not, things will happen beyond our control and it’s up to us whether or not we want to give away our power or take personal responsibility and own how we react.
When we allow outside influences to control how we feel this is giving away our innate power. It reinforces our subconscious mind that we aren’t in control of how we feel, when in actuality we have immense power over how we feel.
Allow yourself some time today to reflect on the following questions in order to understand your own level of personal responsibility:
Personal Responsibility is a powerful force. Once you realize you’re the one that’s actually in control of your life you can begin to fly.
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Louis Smit on Unsplash
When we think about every thought and every action, and distill them down to the essence of what they are, they always stem from two things: Love or Fear.
In other words, energy building or energy wasting.
From the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep every little thing throughout the day is either energy building or energy wasting. The thoughts, the decisions, the actions, the foods, the intentions, literally everything stems from these two.
A Course in Miracles states, “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.”
When we look at it from this perspective we can see how we waste our energy when we act or think based on an unreal “reality”. When we act from fear or lack, we are essentially believing in something that doesn’t truly exist, and therefore leak energy trying to chase or prevent some thing out of fear.
How much more enriching, simple, and true can life be when we act from Love? It feels lighter doesn’t it, when we act from gratitude, service, joy, and abundance knowing this is our truest reality?
It’s incredible just how this tiny shift can change our energetic capacity.
So tell me, how does life feel to you when you are in the mode of energy building? What do you feel in your body? How does life look to you? What does your voice sound like? How does food taste in this state?
Here’s to recognizing the opportunities to build more energy into our lives.
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Katy Belcher on Unsplash
Oftentimes when we find ourselves in a lower state, a mix of emotions that aren’t useful and have been in your mind space for long enough that it doesn’t serve you, we get stuck in a rut.
Why is that? Well, for one, all it takes it 90 seconds to lessen the stronghold of a particular emotion. It passes after 90 seconds. However, most people are so ardently focused on what’s wrong that those 90 seconds are far and few between.
So what can you do to shift your perspective? For one, change your environment. Get out of the house, take a 30 minute break from your office, and most importantly – DO SOMETHING NEW.
The most efficient way to shift your perspective is to do the unexpected.
And the bottom line? The possibilities are endless and the power is in your hands.
So think bright my friends! You’ll be amazed at how the world looks so different when we do the unexpected and shift our perspective in a matter of minutes.
And of course, let’s not forget, if this is a deep and recurring emotion and/or situation we must address the root and do the work.
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Alejandro Alvarez on Unsplash
“I do (have problems), but I don’t contextualize them in that way.”
~Luke Storey
In wellness,
Susan
Photo by Levi Saunders on Unsplash
I’ve debated for as long as my writings have submerged whether or not I wanted to divulge this part of my life. Not because it’s personal, but because the “cure” didn’t come in the form of a person or special herbal supplement. The cure was actually something so simple yet required a miracle mindset to achieve.
Let me start from the beginning.
For as long as I could remember I had debilitating PMS symptoms. From intense cravings, bloating up to 5-7 pounds in water weight, irritability, intense emotions, and this was the clincher for me – depression.
Like clockwork every 2 weeks I would dread the 14 day mark where these symptoms would arrive and drive me crazy until the 3rd day into my menstrual cycle. I began tracking every period so that I can brace myself and prepare for the 2 weeks out of every month (that’s 6 months of the year by the way) where I would need to mentally strap myself in for the ride.
Researching cures was a part time job. During every break and bedtime reading it was reading the latest scientific research on which herbal supplement, exercise, hormone treatment might possibly be the cure for me. I was searching for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow… and the Unicorn.
Birth control pills were out of the question. I tried it once and cried for no reason in public and it wasn’t until my mother asked if I made any changes to my supplement regimen that I realized it was the pill that wasn’t working for me.
What truly helped was getting in tune with my body. The first time I ever realized this was when I went gluten free after having done an elimination diet when I first started Crossfit. Going gluten free was a game changer. No longer did I have the debilitating cramps that kept me popping ibuprofen and staying in bed! However, this was short lived as I still encountered many of the other symptoms that equally drove me crazy.
Fast forward several years I remember being curled up in a ball and fervently praying to God, the Universe, anyone that would listen. I prayed that I be at peace… for my mind was driving me insane.
Just thinking about the next 14 days was driving me crazy. You see, I was perpetually in a state of being a slave to the thought. A puppet to the PMS gods.
I prayed out of desperation because none of my strategies were working and I didn’t have any more cards up my sleeve to even consider.
I prayed to see things differently. Ultimately, I just prayed for peace. I remember distinctly saying, “I don’t even care if I continue on with these symptoms, I just need the peace.”
In complete and utter surrender I fell asleep and the next morning I decided to walk 4 miles to city center instead of taking the bus. In that moment I realized I was in a different state. I remember to this day that if even an inkling of a PMS related thought (or any negative thought for that matter) crossed my mind I just decided, “Nope, not going to think about that right now.” and I moved on.
And fast forward another few years later – still NO PMS SYMPTOMS. None, nada, zilch, nothing.
I remember in all my 20s saying to God, “If you cure me of this I swear I’ll write a blog post about what happened.”. So here I am fulfilling my promise.
And I can almost hear the disappointment because I of all people very well know by no means is this a sexy cure all. I know first hand how desperately satisfying and exciting it is to have someone say, “I tried X product with X person and my disease is completely gone! I am loving life now!”.
But I need to be completely honest of my own experience – it was what worked for me.
If someone would have told me this story in my early 20s I would have rolled my eyes and said, “Yea, lucky you but that isn’t going to work for me.”.
You see, we are playing a movie in our minds eye all the time and what we see is a mere reflection of what we think. We can be at peace right away, symptoms or not, because it isn’t the PMS that is causing us our suffering it is our thought about it.
I just simply changed my thought.
We have become so accustomed to believing our thought is fact when really it’s just a thought. It takes a mental meta-model to truly see the nuances but it can be done. Why do you think mindfulness has made it so big? It’s achieving the same goal of separating thought from fact.
And I get it. It’s not the sexiest cure; but I also understand it’s individual timing. It’s trusting the journey in where you are. It’s the willingness to see things differently and sometimes that willingness only appears when you are so desperate.
Truly this was the moment where I experienced a miracle. I mean, if someone told me I wouldn’t have anymore PMS symptoms the next day I don’t know if I would have believed it.
Again, this was the moment I realized just how powerful our brains truly are.
Were the symptoms real? Of course. But it makes me question (and thus launched me deep into the research of the brain) and why I became an Integrative Life Coach, just how much of the symptoms were caused by the power of my own thoughts vs. my body?
I’ll say it again, through years of my own research I have come to learn that thoughts cause emotions, not the other way around. HOW we look at life, our very own perspective and belief systems, are the very basis of how we will experience life!
This is the true work of personal power. Understanding our very own foundation allows us to become the strong pillars we so desperately seek in our lives.
So whether it is PMS or some other patterned thought/behavior – just recognize that there is possibility in making your experience of the situation completely different.
On that note, I bow deeply to anyone reading this post going through PMS or any other similar situation… your strength, courage, and determination does not go unnoticed.
In deep wellness,
Susan
Photo by freestocks.org on Unsplash