NLP Archives - Page 6 of 8

A quiet morning spent on journaling, quieting the mind, and reading deep truths.

Start Controlling Your Own Experience

“We never really encounter the world; all we experience is our own nervous system”

~Unknown

I’ve been taking advantage of this drizzly Fall weather by reading – a lot! Lately I have been immersed in various texts, mostly yoga but other books related to trauma, NLP, and following your creative passions – a mix as usual 😉

As I was reading through the Bhagavad Gita I came across the quote above. What I love about this quote is that it’s another reminder of the many blog posts written previously about our minds and our experiences. If you’re new let me re-cap: What you experience is controlled by your own mind. Yes, if you can laugh at the irony.. great! The punchline is that we control it all!

I’ve mentioned before how much power there is in realizing this truth. Sure, there might be years of neural work that have paved a deep groove within our networks but our brains are just as powerful to create new ones. This is empowerment; knowing you can change any time, any where.

So let this one sink in a bit. Imagine, if I’m controlling my own experiences without even realizing it how much more power could I have by really owning it?

Really owning is more than half the battle. For anyone desiring additional assistance I, and many others, can help what is known as the meta model to really reinforce the desired change. In NLP there is a technique described as the meta model. A proven methodology to help you pave a new neural pathway for real change. I’ve seen this do amazing things from greatly reduce anxiety, fear, to increasing confidence, and much more. Again, the great part is, if you’re already nodding along to this blog post you’ll get the swing of things much quicker and on to real change!

But there’s a lot we can do in the meantime! Here’s to realizing 1) we have the ability to control our experiences and 2) that the power of choice is equally available to us and in our control, yup, the choice between the good experience and the bad experience.

Stay warm and most importantly start owning!

In deep wellness,

Susan

Sharing Your Voice

“Yes, but there are hundreds of people already doing this.”

“But aren’t blogs dead now?”

“I don’t know… what does it matter if I share X when it’s been said a hundred times?”

These are all reasons why NOT to share your voice. Actually, let me clarify: these are all reasons your FEAR would have you not share your voice, isn’t it?

I’m sure it’s happened to us all where you read a book, or listened to a podcast, or even heard your friend say something to you that inspired him/her, and suddenly a light goes off inside that sparked an inspiration so deep it got through to the heart of you. Or maybe you saw a movie that tugged at your heart… only to later find out it was a re-make of a book written 15 years ago.

Well, guess what? It’s been said before but it was the energy, the likeness, the word choices, the person that got through to you…

As A Course in Miracles says, everybody is a teacher to someone and that someone is a teacher to someone else.

Let me be the one to remind you today – your voice is unique. The world needs you!

Who are we to dim our light and be so arrogant as to say we shouldn’t share our voice anyway?

When we do it for the higher purpose of spreading the light the answer is easy isn’t it?

So I encourage you, don’t dim your light. Share your voice when needed. It doesn’t have to be in a big or loud way, it can be in your small actions, a gesture, speaking up for someone, being kind… the ways are endless but it starts with you.

Here’s to being a little more brave and vulnerable, and trusting you have something to offer. Because trust me, you have an impact.

In wellness,

Susan

Moving Forward

Everyday may not be perfect, but one step backwards doesn’t suddenly define where you actually are. LEARN then most importantly FORGET.

#keepmoving
#lookforward

In wellness,

Susan

Building The Personal Power Mindset

In an earlier post I wrote about personal power and how easy it is to give it away to other people, objects, or simply daily events that happen in our lives.

Today, I wanted to focus specifically on one major way we give away our power so easily, and that is: caring about what other people think.

If you’ve done the 24 hour self realization test you may have noticed this particular theme come up over and over again. Why is it that we care so damn much about what others think? To the point that it actually changes our very own behavior and possibly the trajectory of our path?

Let’s be honest, we’ve all done this at one point or another in the past. Heck, maybe even within the last day!

Your baby is uncomfortable and crying on his/her first flight and you’re flushed and embarrassed at the thought of other people being annoyed at you and your baby.
You wear something amazing to school or work only to notice someone else is getting much more attention. You decide to keep your jacket on and wear your outfit on another day.
You pack your lunch because there’s an important lunch meeting and you notice no one else is eating. You decide to eat later and hope to God your stomach doesn’t growl during the hour.
You have an accent and you’re afraid other’s might think less of you so you avoid any job that requires speaking over the phone or public speaking.

The list can go on…

What I’ve noticed a million times over is that people who have this tendency are doing one thing 90% of the time – they aren’t caring enough about themselves.

What’s happening in our brains is that we are already looking outward and caught up in a fear based state of other people’s projection. Now, remember what I’ve said over and over again – with every action there is an opposite and equal reaction. This is power.

If you have a tendency to immediately jump to what other people think, you also have an equal tendency (or the opportunity) to immediately jump to what YOU care about in yourself.

Instead of caring about what other people think about you, why not care about what you want to do?

Why not care about your world for once?
Why not care about your voice?
Why not care about how your potential failure can lead to future success?
Why not care about yourself?

You may begin to feel something shift within you. You may begin to imagine all the times that if you shifted your mindset to caring about yourself first, how empowering this actually feels.

Remember, no one is actually thinking about you as much as they are thinking about themselves.

Take baby steps to build your personal power. Use the right tools whether they be books, meditation, a spiritual practice, or a coach/therapist to get you along the right path.

Owning your personal power is a birth right and we need as many people (with the truest of intentions) to step into their God given power – your true Light!

In wellness,

Susan

Friday Focus – 10/27/17 {Shedding Trauma}

I don’t know where you guys are in the world but Seattle is having an absolutely gorgeous day. I mean, look at the sky and these beautiful amber turned leaves!

As I walked the pup this morning hearing the crunch of fallen leaves… I couldn’t help but think about old stories. Experiences. Hurts. Past Traumas.

If you’ve been reading along you know I emphasize how powerful our brains are. It’s interesting and noteworthy, again, to recognize our brains are powerful. So powerful that they hold on to these old stories, experiences, hurts, and past traumas in order to help us. But without special attention what can happen is that they begin to inhibit us.

It keeps us small. afraid. quiet. simple. frustrated. angry. bewildered. anxious.

And in staying small (and afriad, quiet, simple, frustrated, angry, bewildered, anxious, etc.) we begin to generalize these core feelings until it becomes a THING. Suddenly it’s not in the past anymore it’s something you believe you have now.

So what’s REALLY the thing, the thing in the past or the thing now?

Does it even matter?

No matter what conclusion you came to, what matters is re-training your brain to stop from firing the old story over and over again in the present moment. The larger YOU knows you are safe. You have options. You aren’t IN the past you’re IN the NOW. And largely, we have God.

When we come to understand this truth, we begin to break the barrier.

We begin to notice the firing.

That’s not to say there isn’t more work to be done such as Release Work and Re-Training The Neural Network. While it sounds deep and heavy, trust me… with a good practitioner you can be healed and released from old hurts and begin taking steps toward the life you know you deserve. Yes, it’s possible.

So back to Fall… as I listened to the crunch of fallen leaves this morning I couldn’t help but think what a great time it is to release and re-train. Nature reveals everything. After the harvest comes death and rebirth. Yet, it’s ironic how this is barely practiced in our own lives. Where are the rituals to process our latest stories and hurts? Do we take the time for the yearly tune up we all could use?

So this Fall I am thankful. I am thankful for the reminder of death and rebirth. With every action there is a reaction. With every force there is an opposite force. With every old story there is a new story. Nature proves this so and how powerful is that?

In wellness,

Susan

Friday Focus – 10/20/17 {Don’t Let IT Define You}

Labels. Society and humans have created labels as a way to quickly categorize every thing possible including the way we feel. While it is highly efficient to name and label things so that we can go about our lives and continue to evolve, labels can be detrimental to our quality of life.

What I’ve seen time and time again is how a feeling or an event can suddenly be so generalized in the mind that suddenly you are IT.

For example, you have a prolonged depressive time in your life where you are in a medical condition you wish you didn’t have. Suddenly that moment (or moments) where you felt severely depressed is so generalized you are suddenly “in depression”.

Or how about the few times at work where rushing deadlines and frantic managers have caused an uncomfortable level of anxiety within you and suddenly you believe you “have anxiety”.

This list is endless as you can imagine. Fortunately, through awareness and active monitoring of our thoughts, we can stop the generalization of these moment to moment feelings so that we suddenly aren’t just a label.

Yes, that feeling was real. The event did happen. However, it doesn’t define who you really are.

You are much more than the feeling that lasted a couple of minutes or maybe an hour or two. You are much more than what happened in the past. You are now. You are living and breathing. You are love in this very moment. You are the experiencer of experiences. Not the actual experience.

The power is in your minds, and how freeing is this? To know you always have a choice. To know that if it’s possible to generalize a thought so much so that we become the thought, that we have the same power to go the complete opposite direction and unbecome that very thought in an instant.

Powerful thoughts on this wonderful Friday morning.

In wellness,

Susan

Visualization – Getting To The Truth In Minutes

Have you ever found yourself literally talking to yourself inside your head? Or perhaps talking to yourself, and it’s as if you can’t stop your own voice from thinking?

“I know what I’ll say to her when I see him next time, I’m going to say….”

“That just doesn’t make sense, why would you even think such a thought? It’s not even who you are!”

“Why is this the longest minute ever… and I still need to run another 3 minutes before my next station. Oh I see that it’s still raining maybe I do need to get that new umbrella this season.”

“Why am I having this thought and why the hell can’t I stop myself from thinking?!”

And so it goes on…

If you’re advanced in the mindfulness arena you’re well aware this is your ego, your smaller self. But what is one to do once you’re aware of what’s actually going on?

One way, as there are several, is the use of NLP. What I love about NLP is the use of customized visualization. You can visualize whatever detail you need to help you get to the truth and today, I will share with you exactly what helps me in this type of situation when I struggle with stopping thoughts whirring inside my head.

Whenever I need to get out of my head and into my heart I drop into the heart space. I go straight to visualizing my living, breathing heart in the flesh. I imagine it’s steady heartbeat, the blood pumping in and out of the main arteries. I see my heart doing what it does automatically and suddenly I feel and know the deeper truth of the moment. It’s as if I stepped down (or up, remember NLP is all about finding out what works for YOU) out of the silliness of my thoughts into something real… the TRUTH.

Now stop and think about what works for YOU. Is it imagining that you’re suddenly in outer space and you can’t hear a single thing? Or maybe it’s visualizing looking into your dog’s eyes and knowing there is a deeper wisdom in those eyes and by looking into those eyes suddenly you are made aware of a deep truth you always knew inside.

You see, visualization is limitless. You just need to find what works for YOU and how powerful is that?

Spend a few minutes today figuring out what works for you. After all, it may save you hours of misery from the mental rat race we so easily find ourselves in if we’re not mindful of our thoughts 😉

In wellness,

Susan

Are You Giving Away Your Power?

Are you? Are you aware of how often you give away your very own power? Are you aware that your power is limitless and no matter how empty you feel, you can feel on top of the world in an instant?

When we aren’t conscious about it, we give away our power in so. many. ways.

Case in point:

Someone is rude to you and you feel offended. I mean, how could they?!
You’re trying to make a coffee order and the server treats you halfheartedly while smiling enthusiastically at someone else. Really?
The customer service rep doesn’t seem to respect your situation. I can’t even…
Your boss/client says something in passing and you can’t seem to stop thinking about what they said. What’s wrong with me? Am I a failure?
It’s a month into your new diet and the scale doesn’t seem to agree. Why do I feel like a loser?
A beautiful, young woman seems to have everything going for her while you happen to be in your rumpy old work out clothes. Don’t go there, don’t go there…

While these may not all apply to you, the point of the examples above was to reflect the ways in which we give away our power so easily. To others, to objects, and yes, even that small anxious voice in our very own heads.

The first step in harnessing our own power is simple yet requires training and discipline.

It’s self realization.

Have you actually tried to count the ways you give away your power in a single day. I bet you’d be surprised at what comes up 😉

Try it! Set an alarm each hour and track the moments of the past 60 minutes in which you felt annoyed, depressed, stressed, or worried. At the end of the day, you may notice an overarching theme or two… or three.

You see, most of the “why’s” in which we give away our power stems from old beliefs or anchored fears. What do I mean by that? Here are a few examples:

I’m never good enough
People don’t respect me
What if I don’t make it?
I’m not loveable
I’m emotionally weak
I appear to be too powerful
People don’t listen to me
I get sick too easily
People always seem to leave me
I’m “fat” or I’m “too skinny”

This list can go on forever… that’s how smart and powerful our minds are. If we aren’t careful we can be chasing this wild rabbit for YEARS.

I can’t tell you enough how many people begin to expand their own awareness once they realize what their overarching themes are.

Once you realize what old beliefs and anchored fears are holding you back you begin to step OUT of the story and IN to your own power.

For the most deeply rooted fears and limiting beliefs there are several techniques that can be used to help offset the years of patterned behavior which I hope to write about soon. But for now, try the 24 hour journal. Get to know your self in a way that will change your life forever.

In wellness,

Susan

Do You Believe in Miracles?

Have you ever experienced a miracle? Something that completely changed your life in an instant?

What I’ve seen over and over again (and I love witnessing this in my own life as well) is that once you believe in miracles you naturally begin to live in the present moment. The surrendering has already begun. The magic is already happening.

There comes a moment when you can’t seem to handle the fear, worry, stress, dilemma (whatever is causing suffering for you) and you almost, in defeat, let it go.

That’s the beautiful part.

Suddenly you sense a lightness. And you realize it was never in your control anyway. It was never yours to begin with. How funny is that?

Our minds are powerful. And unfortunately (or fortunately) you can’t believe in two things. You can’t believe in fear AND believe that miracles can occur. You must choose one or the other, and for as long as you are trapped in your own fear, there can’t possibly be a way to witness a miracle.

That’s when you allow the down to be down. Don’t resist, just let it be. Because the sooner you relinquish control, the sooner you come to realize control isn’t the answer.

Life can be funny, but what I’ve come to realize as truth, is that it’s all perspective and beliefs at the end of the day.

What lens are you wearing today?

What driving belief is charting the course of your past, today, and subsequent future?

Choose wisely my friends. Be conscious and spend some time with your inner most wisest self.

In wellness,

Susan

The Paradise Dilemma

I’m in Seoul for some much needed family time and I told myself I would stay away from technology.. but wanted to share what I call the Paradise Dilemma. Before I get into that though can we talk about how beautiful this city is? Today I felt the first REAL day of Fall! There was a certain crispness in the air and I can tell by the way the light is hitting the trees our Earth is shifting into Autumn. It’s beautiful. Despite everything that is going on in this country the people continue to be vivacious, kind, and ever so generous…

The other day one of my closest friends happened to have an overnight layover in Seoul and it was as if the 6 months that went by without talking to one another never even existed. We walked to at an adorable cafe in Bukchon village and had the biggest serving of Jeju green tea bingsoo (shaved ice) and chatted away until it was time for our next meal!

What I love about our friendship is that we get it. Despite the sometimes worried tone of the updates the truth is we get what’s really happening – that we are held always, that we are the master of our thoughts.

That’s where the Paradise Dilemma comes into play. You see, once our basic needs are met (food, shelter, saftey) we’re in paradise and suddenly our ego believes there’s always something better and bigger leaving us in a state of continuous wonderment as to whether or not this is actually true. Some thoughts that may leave you in this dilemma can be as simple or as complex as:

Is there someone better out there? (as you are in a steady relationship)
Could I be living a more exciting life?
Is this the job I’m really meant to have?
I wish I had a better community where I am truly accepted.
And the thoughts go on and on as you can imagine…

The problem doesn’t lie in the thought itself, it’s the slightest belief in the possibility that suddenly catapults us into some better, imaginary future.

Now, this doesn’t mean things are always black and white. There’s a fine line between buying into our a egoic thoughts and tapping into our truest potential.

So what’s the difference? How can we separate the two?

It’s detachment. It’s becoming aware of when you are identified with a story (even if it’s a future story). It’s knowing you are in heaven as we speak and the present is all there is. It’s giving your best with what you have and are capable of TODAY and surrendering all outcomes to your higher self. It’s understanding these thoughts are natural and giving them even more meaning just means you are breathing life into each passing thought. It’s understanding that the more you entertain and dwell in these worried thoughts it keeps you further and further away from one simple TRUTH – that the present is all we ever really have.

And just as important, it’s recognizing that what you are chasing is a feeling and for the most part that feeling can only be controlled by you and you alone. After all, when you acquire and/or achieve X there’s only a shinier, bigger, better object in the near future right?

That’s why I am so thankful for NLP, advancements in neuroscience and mindfulness. It’s our biggest protector against our own selves; that’s how smart we are!

With that said, I’m off to go on another urban hike through the city. Here’s to enjoying what is unfolding in each and every moment and being thankful for each and every breath we take.

In wellness,

Susan