There Is Only Love Archives

Friday Focus – 6/8/18 {True Commitment}

“Modern psychology houses that when we start something and don’t complete it, or make a resolution and don’t keep it, we’re forming a habit of failure – absolute ignonimous failure.”

~Charles F. Haanel

Have you ever dreamed of something and knew in your heart of hearts, that no matter what, you would achieve or attain what was in your minds eye?

I’ll give you a personal and simple example. Back when I was in high school, I had transferred from Seoul, in the middle of 10th grade, to another high school in Tokyo. While I eventually came to love my experience, in the beginning I was anything but happy.

My life quickly fell into a spiral of depression from missing my closest friends back home. With absolutely nothing to do I started filling up my time with volunteer activities and joining literally every extracurricular activity my school offered.

Why did I do that? Well, the new goal that quickly formed in my mind was, “I’m going to get into the college of my choice”, because for me, going to college symbolized freedom and adulthood. Having all this free time gave me a way to transform all the stagnant, depressive energy into something useful and by the time that goal was cemented into my brain I knew there was no way around it.

That was my first experience with true commitment.

There was no other option. Nothing held a candle to my goal that would have had me choose my actions differently. It became simple in my minds eye; LIFE became simple because everything either helped my goal or didn’t help my goal.

And trust me, I failed a lot. I tried my hand at joining the JV volleyball team and boy did I seriously NOT make the cut! There were looks and possible thoughts of, “wow, she’s really trying out for this?”, but guess what? I didn’t even blink an eye. People’s opinion (which by the way we truly have no way of validating everyone’s opinion) ranked so low on my priority list toward true commitment that it wasn’t even a concept to consider or to take the time thinking about.

When we have true commitment towards a goal it also helps us to get to where we want to be FASTER. We don’t allow doubt to enter our minds. We don’t allow other shiny objects distract us from our vision. We see with picture perfect clarity what is important to us in order to achieve our dream.

Finding true commitment is a personal journey. No one can do this for you because only YOU know you. You know what makes yourself tick and gets you going. No one else can determine your dream and that’s the beauty of doing the work to getting to know our inner world.

True commitment also takes work. We need to find and break through limiting beliefs, but what I’ve also found is that when you truly find your true commitment, this new commitment often becomes your new anchoring belief, and this anchoring belief obliterates any limiting beliefs you might have had previously.

So, what dreams did you dream for 2018? If you haven’t started yet, or are struggling with start/stop mentality (this is when you find yourself starting and then stopping), what is the thought that is holding you back? Can you take the time to identify what your true commitment is for each of your dreams?

When you get good at commitment and following through on your own word, you also build confidence. You begin to understand that obstacles are just hurdles to overcome and nothing is unsolvable. And when you continue to do this, you begin to build personal resilience. And that my friend, is power.

In wellness,

Susan

Susan is a Life Coach based in Seattle, WA. Her main focus is to coach people build a strong emotional container so that we can experience the fullness of life coming from a place of deep confidence. Susan also coaches clients looking to heal adrenal fatigue by using a mental meta-model aimed at breaking down old mental patterns and behaviors so that we can finally tap into our own personal power.

Photo by Estée Janssens on Unsplash

Friday Focus – 4/27/18 {Trust The Path}

This week’s theme is trust.

So often I’ve heard over and over again how being confused about what next step to take can be one of the most frustrating experiences a human can go through. To feel lost, without purpose, and trying to get back up, but no North Star pointing the way. What’s a person to do?

At times like this I tell others, and myself, to trust the path you’re on.

Just trust it. Every discomfort, from the uncomfortable emotions to all the triggers, is for a bigger perspective we just can’t see yet.

I’d like to think of these moments as a gift from the Universe. As if God is saying, “let’s see if you can tackle this one” so that we can evolve to begin the next chapter.

Sometimes we need to shed a few unnecessary and un-serving layers within our psyche to finally see the path, and unfortunately this is going to take as long as it needs.

But what we have always is trust. When we trust we become open, and when we are open we become lighter, and with this lightness of our minds we open our awareness enough to have true sight about the situation.

And with this we can begin to lessen our grip on control and breathe in a sigh of relief that things are unfolding for our betterment, and our focus can be to see things with curiosity instead of fear.

Afterall, through this curiosity we just may see the ah-ha…

In wellness,

Susan

May We Love More

May we trust our heart more than our head.

May we smile more than we frown.

May we see the good more than the bad.

May we detach from outcomes and trust in the unfolding.

May we lean in to discomfort, only to find our own true capacity to love.

May we love…more.

In wellness,

Susan

Photo by Helena Lopes on Unsplash

Happy Holidays!

With utmost gratitude and respect, the stillness within sees the stillness within you. Thank you for joining me on this journey and may you be filled with joy, love, and peace on this day.

In wellness,

Susan

Photo by Josh Boot on Unsplash

A Seattle Community of Sisterhood

For the past 6 months I have felt a deep calling to create community, a sisterhood, here in Seattle.

This deep desire would grow then fade depending on how many projects I had going on as well as managing my travel schedule. One big deterrent from starting this community was location; I had no idea what 2018 would look like and would ask myself questions such as, “Would it even be worth it to me or others not knowing whether Life would take me outside of Seattle in 2018?”.

Until earlier this month (December), I knew deep down that this desire was calling and it wouldn’t stop.

The need to guide, connect, and be the Seer for anyone who needed it was a strong enough risk for me to take.

And I know deep down I would be the one who’s heart is filled and brimming with gratitude and love at everyone’s willingness, honesty, and own respect for their journey and desire for connection.

So with that said, be on the look out for more details! I’ll be creating an official channel via MeetUp where I will post 1:1 coaching session dates, Moon Circles, community gatherings, and much more.

I can’t wait to connect.

In community,

Susan

Photo by Cristina Cerda on Unsplash

When You’re Stuck In Fear

Oftentimes when working with clients we come across a situation, and it could be the most mundane situation, and yet the mind can’t seem to loosen it’s grip on it.

Whether it’s from a traumatizing experience, or perhaps the client is already in a stressful situation, or maybe it’s hitting a very sensitive part of the client’s soul – a part of them that needs X to feel secure and safe.

Regardless of how hard the grip is we have to remind ourselves that our brain is programmed to behave this way thanks to how smart we are and the years of repetitive Miracle Combo’ing we do.

What is the Miracle Combo? MC is when you behave in such a way that actively engages the thought with a rush of feeling & emotion throughout the body while repeating this action until it begins to groove a new path in your neural network. It’s the Miracle Combo I’ve seen work over and over again whether you use it to define a new, positive neural pathway or hard-wire a negative pathway.

But back to fear. We need to realize fear is nothing but:

a familiar state we innately have within us
a state that needs to be acknowledged, not pushed away
a state that is trying to protect us

When we objectively look at what is causing us fear, it is typically not even in present RIGHT NOW. It is typically a future state our minds wander to and gets stuck with repetitive thinking.

Fear becomes bigger in our minds because it suddenly becomes the pure focus of our attention. Remember that phrase, “what you focus on grows”? Well, it’s true. So in order for this not to get any bigger than it actually is you need to acknowledge the fearful state and accept it. Instead, what most people do is try to control the fear, not think about the fear, or fix the problem.

Thankfully there are several NLP techniques and coaching frameworks (a hyper focused awareness session is one of my favorites for calming the mind and inducing beta/theta states) to help each individual person identify what works best for them when it comes to their unique fear. For one person it may be simple as shifting their unconscious attention by way of bilateral stimulation, or perhaps it’s tapping the meridians as a way to release stuck energy, or using self hypnosis to speak to the unconscious mind.

If you’re stuck in a fearful state just know there is a way to peace. Let this be a reminder to you that your LIGHT is much bigger than any fearful thought. That your fear is nothing but a small part of you that wants to seek and be in Love. That this fear doesn’t define who you actually are.

You are light. You are divine. You are whole. You are always held by something so much greater than we can possibly imagine.

With love,

Susan.

What To Do If You’re An Empath

Do you find yourself feeling anxious, depressed, or flighty after meeting new people or being in a large group?
Do you find it hard to get rid of these emotions you didn’t necessarily feel before?
Do you oftentimes get confused as to whether or not you really feel any of this and find yourself questioning what is really going on?
Do you feel like a pendulum when it comes to emotions? Feeling all the highs and all the lows?

If you responded yes to any of the questions above it could be an indication of your empathic nature. While it’s great to feel into situations and people so quickly, what’s not great is not knowing what to do when people shed all of their energy on to you to soak up.

As an Empath, you may not know what to do when it comes to releasing what’s not yours. Or may you do know what to do but it doesn’t seem to work.

While every Empath is different from one another, I thought I’d share a few techniques that work for me. Keep in mind you may need to try these techniques a couple of times in order to get used to a new technique or perhaps find a tweak that works perfectly for YOU.

Faster EFT. If you haven’t heard of tapping find someone who can teach you or ask Google to teach you. In my case, I found it immensely helpful to learn from someone. Essentially you are tapping on major meridian points along your face and chest to release the specific emotion or thought from the situation that is causing you to feel an undesired emotion. Imagine all the negative emotion draining away from your body! It’s astonishing how quickly it works and you can apply it to just about any situation you come across, not just empathic episodes.
Grounding/Earthing. I find this to be therapeutic as well. I wrote about Tree Medicine in an earlier blog post and there are many ways to ground yourself. Energetically we are surrounded my technology and of course other people’s energy and the Earth (think of a magnet) has the ability to absorb that which you don’t need. How wonderful is Mother Nature? Plant your bare feet into the sand, dirt, or grass. Feel the waves of relaxation come over you as you feel every drop of negative energy which does not serve you seeping into the ground beneath you. It’s Mother Nature’s caring way.
Connect to the Highest Love. This is by far my favorite and most impactful. Have you ever cried without even thinking about it when something touched your heart so much? Felt the pang of deep stirring within your heart from something you saw, felt, or read? This is connecting to the Highest Love. This kind of Love is so deep and so real you suddenly realize what you are carrying isn’t even REAL. What you are trying to rationalize in your mind doesn’t even MATTER. This Highest Love, which is in all of us, doesn’t care about what just happened, all it cares about is bringing you to the TRUTH of who you are, and only you know what this Truth is. You can connect to your Highest Love in a number of ways:
- Hugging someone you deeply love and care about
- Talking to God and letting him know how much you love him/her
- Breathing deeply and getting still; knowing this Higher Love is within you always
- Doing something you absolutely love for 15 minutes (yes 15 minutes); for me it’s working with CLAY
- Last but not least any of the two suggestions above

At the end of the day don’t despair. Nothing is permanent in this world and neither are these feelings.

As humans it is our job to learn and evolve so if you’re new to your superpowers as an Empath or you’ve been on this journey and still trying to figure it out, just know you are fully capable of making positive change in your life. Surround yourself with your own network of guides and teachers, and most importantly believe change is possible.

In wellness,

Susan